How To Salvage Your Marriage After An Affair

salvage marriageAn Affair Does Not Mean The Marriage Is Over

It’s tough stuff having to deal with an affair in the your life. There are so many ways for a marriage to go wrong that it’s not a surprise when it happens, but there are still so many reasons to make sure you keep it together if you want to keep it together. I live in Long Beach, USA and I got caught cheating years ago when I got sucked into some dirty chat rooms and had some casual hookups for a couple weeks. I did not even realize that the sexy chat rooms would lead so easily to having a discreet affair. It was all on my watch and it was all over before I even realized it was actually happening!

Getting caught cheating did really help me make sense of what I wanted out of my marriage. I realized that sexy chat rooms are not going to make me a better person. I realized that I was running away from the big problems in my life, and that my wife was the only person who was able to help me fight through and improve myself. Chat rooms are great little escapes for anyone to get some simple satisfaction for a little moment. While we all want to feel desire and have sexy chat room conversations once and awhile, at a certain point we all have to make the tough decision to either break free and be single, or salvage an affair and work on marriage with our partners. As a guy I can give you some idea of what to expect from your wife if you were caught cheating by having a discreet affair, even if it was just sexy chat room conversations.

Salvage An Affair

She’s going to need some space. A lot of space. My wife needed me to move to an apartment building for a few months as she processed my mistakes and tried to find the space in her heart to forgive me. It was something I had to be okay with, and I was. I actually think it made me such a stronger person. I spent a lot of time alone, and in that time I realized how much I had betrayed her trust, and how seriously I wanted and needed her in my life. The time that she took alone was good for her too. She allowed me to see her for coffee once a week during that time, and I don’t know if she was having sex with someone else during that time. Knowing her, I don’t think she was, but I know that she was thinking about it.

I apologized for my actions in that period, and told her I would never use online cam dating sites again. She did not know that I was involved in chat rooms for a long period of her marriage. She looked into my history when she I was caught cheating, and she found all the times I had been using chat rooms. She even was able to look over the sexy chat room conversations I had with other ladies, and that really put her over the edge. However, in time she was able to forgive me, and I can proudly say that I was able to salvage an affair and keep my marriage.

Caught Cheating

Being caught cheating means that you give all power and authority in the relationship over to your partner who you betrayed. In my case, that meant living separate for a few months as she came to terms with everything. It also meant a whole new personality change for me. I went from being a quiet and macho guy to a more emotionally aware spiritual person.

Before my affair I was under the impression that men had to be strong and silent to succeed in the world and get the girls. I was certainly successful at that in my life, and I found that persona to work well in chat rooms as well. My wife was okay with my strong and quiet side, but she was the only woman I met who tried to cultivate my softer side. It’s that skill of hers that brought me back to her after I got lost in sexy chat rooms and discreet affairs. She was able to bring a whole different side of me out for the world to see. After a few months of living alone I was able to cultivate that side of myself on my own. I read a lot of books on astrology, I got into playing the piano, and I generally got more attuned to my emotional side. So there is a really good reason to salvage your marriage: personal development.

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